Module 4 - What's stopping me?

To help participants recognise, understand, and begin to overcome the psychological, behavioural, and social barriers that inhibit progress toward their goals. The module fosters emotional resilience, self-compassion, and practical problem-solving - helping participants replace avoidance or self-defeating habits with intentional, growth-oriented action.

By the end of this module, participants will be able to:

1. Identify internal and external barriers that hinder progress towards goals.

2. Recognise patterns of avoidance, self-sabotage, and limiting beliefs.

3. Apply basic cognitive-behavioural techniques to reframe negative thought patterns.

4. Use emotional regulation and resilience strategies to manage setbacks.

5. Develop a personal “barrier management plan” that anticipates obstacles and proposes adaptive responses.

Activities:

• Facilitator input: Introduce the concept of barriers — psychological (fear, procrastination, low confidence), social (peer influence, family expectations), and structural (finance, access, opportunity).

• Exercise: “What’s stopping me?” mind map — participants brainstorm all potential obstacles between themselves and their goals, without censoring.

• Group discussion: Which barriers are within your control, and which are not?

• Reflection: “If I could remove one barrier, what difference would it make?”

Activities:

• Mini lecture: Fear of failure and success — how both can paralyse action (Atkinson, 1957). Explain the “comfort zone” model and the value of manageable challenge.

• Discussion: What do we avoid, and why? Link to evolutionary roots of avoidance (safety-seeking). The primacy of pleasure and pain in influencing our decisions.

• Exercise: Participants identify one recurring avoidance pattern (e.g., procrastination, withdrawal, humour as deflection) and analyse its triggers and short-term payoffs.

• Reflection: “What might happen if I faced this fear once, instead of always avoiding it?”

Activities:

• Facilitator input: Differentiate between guilt (“I did something bad”) and shame (“I am bad”). Introduce the concept of toxic shame and its developmental roots (building on Module 1).

• Exercise: “Voices in my head” – participants list common negative thoughts they have about themselves.

• Group activity: Reframing exercise – rewrite each statement in compassionate, reality-based language.

• Reflection: “If I spoke to a friend the way I speak to myself, how would they feel?”

Activities:

• Mini lecture: Introduction to cognitive distortions (all-or-nothing thinking, catastrophising, labelling, mind-reading, etc.).

• Exercise: Identify one recent setback or conflict and analyse it using the ABCDE model (Adversity–Belief–Consequence–Disputation–Effect).

• Group discussion: Healthy versus unhealthy coping strategies (e.g., avoidance vs. active problem-solving).

• Practical task: Introduce quick regulation tools—controlled breathing, grounding, or “STOPP” technique (Stop, Take a breath, Observe, Pull back, Practise).

Activities:

• Facilitator input: Explain resilience (Masten, 2014) as “ordinary magic” — the capacity to adapt and recover. Introduce growth mindset (Dweck, 2006) and the concept of “failing forward.”

• Exercise: “Resilience timeline” – participants chart three moments in their life where they faced difficulty but overcame it.

• Discussion: What helped you get through? What could you do differently next time?

• Reflection: “What does resilience mean to me personally?”

Activities:

• Task: Each participant completes a Barrier Management Plan including:

1. Key Barriers: internal and external.
2. Triggers: what activates them.
3. Coping Strategies: cognitive, behavioural, and emotional.
4. Support: people or systems to contact when challenges arise.
5. Commitments: one change they will make immediately to manage a specific barrier.

• Pair work: Share and refine plans through constructive peer feedback.

• Closing reflection: “What have I learned about how I stop myself - and how I can move forward differently?”